Inner Critics

Apr 3, 2018 by Melissa

The Seven Inner Critics:

1. The Perfectionist: Makes it difficult to start or finish things.  Criticizes imperfections.

2. The Taskmaster: Tries to get you to work really hard and be successful.  It tells you that you are lazy, stupid and no good in order to get you to work harder.

3. The Inner Controller: Controls impulses and failings such as overeating, drinking too much, addictive activity.  It thinks it is helping you to control urges or emotions.  It is not kind.

4. The Molder: Tells you that you need to conform to family or cultural expectations in order to be accepted.  It makes you feel fear, guilt or shame if you try to express yourself in ways that do not fit the mold.

5. The Guilt Tripper: Makes you feel bad about something you have done.  It is harsh, nasty and never lets go.  It might never forgive you.

6. The Underminer: Tries to undermine your sense of self-confidence and your motivation in order to keep you from taking risks so that you do not get hurt.

7. The Destroyer: Attacks your basic sense of self and tries to crush you before the world crushes you.  If you are alive, you will be attacked and hurt.  It fosters a basic sense of worthlessness. It never lets you see the good in yourself.

ALL INNER CRITICS HAVE A POTENTIALLY HEALTHY SIDE OR A POSITIVE FUNCTION IT IS TRYING TO SERVE.  IT IS IMPORTANT TO UNDERSTAND THAT THESE INNER CRITICS ARE TRYING TO PROTECT YOU FROM PAIN AND SUFFERING.  THEY DO NOT REALIZE THAT THEY ARE CAUSING PAIN BY PROTECTING YOU.  ONCE YOU ACCEPT THIS, IT IS EASIER TO ESTABLISH A BETTER RELATIONSHIP WITH THE PROTECTORS AND FIND A HEALTHIER WAY TO BE IN THE WORLD.

 

From: “Self Therapy” by Jay Earley (Internal Family Systems).